Should You Be Friends With Your Employees?

If you are in a leadership role, then be the boss, not a friend. Nevertheless, one of the things that separate a great manager from a good manager is the manager’s ability to be cordial and friendly with the members of his or her team. Drawing the line between cordiality and friendship can be difficult, but here we discuss some of the reasons why it is best not to be friends with your employees, and why it’s best to keep your relationship on a professional level. It’s in Our Nature Humans are social creatures – it’s ingrained in our nature. However, we all gravitate more toward some people than to others. Being amicable with your team is a great way to encourage communication and to motivate, but if you start to approach them as friends, you will naturally be closer to some more than others. The “others” will inevitable question your decisions and perhaps accuse you of favoritism. In fact, some managers do tend to give their closer “friends” more benefits, so the accusation of favoritism might not be far off. If you refrain from being friends with your employees, your decisions will be centered on performance; favoritism will be a baseless accusation. What’s more, attempts to become friends with your employees can come across as insincere precisely because certain individuals may not be the sort of person with whom you would normally be on friendly terms. You may mean well and you may be trying to be friendly with these people to avoid signs of favoritism, but at the end of the day, we know when others are genuinely interested in getting to know us. Coming across as insincere can undermine your authority and respect; that will make it difficult for you to do your job, let alone make sure your team members are doing theirs. Professional Responsibility Trumps Personal Relationships The boss/employee and friend/friend relationships are very different in their essence. Friends are equals, while the boss is by definition the superior. You may think that you can get more out of your team if they are also friends, but remember that ultimately you are in a leadership role and are responsible for all decisions. Where friends can disagree and choose not to go the same route, as management you need to be able to discipline your employees— something that is exceedingly difficult if they are also your friends.

Source: Should You Be Friends With Your Employees?


About Stephen G. Barr, Group Publisher

Author, Syndicated Columnist, Editor In-Chief and Group Publisher at SGB Media Group, a social media marketing firm specializing in digital media content production, publishing, affiliate marketing, public relations and advertising. Over 25 years experience in retailing, advertising, website & online forum development, niche social networking, affiliate marketing, search optimization, branding and identity, site location, non-profit fund raising. Event planning, promotion, production and MC/Host at public events. Author, Editor & Publisher of 35 syndicated, digital publications utilizing multiple digital distribution channels in conjunction with launching and administrating national advertising campaigns for major Fortune 500 advertisers in partnership with Google, Ning, Facebook, Myspace, Yahoo, DoubleClick, LinkShare, PepperJam and other industry leading third party affiliate networks. Product development team member from conception to launch on many websites, tangible goods and organizational structure for start ups. Specialties: Public relations, retailing, advertising, website & online forum development, niche social networking, blogging, email campaigns, affiliate/performance marketing, search optimization, branding and identity, site location, event production & promotion, non-profit fund raising and tasteful, responsible adult content publishing. An internationally recognized and read social media columnist & pundit on The Examiner, Associate Content,, and Technorati and his own affiliated sites.
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